Dirty Joe's Joke Of The Week | The Sneaky Old Man & Birthday Woman | Sept 3-2017

A Mans View Funny Story Joke Of The Week Mens Topics

Sneaky Old Guy's Can Be Perverts!

In Omaha, Nebraska a middle aged woman had just spent $20,000 On Facial Cosmetic surgery. The woman was all healed up and it was her birthday. She was running errands around town. And decided to stop at a local grocery store. As she was checking out. She asked the sales guy at the register, "I hope you really don't mind this question. But How old do you think I am?"  The register guy looks her up and down. And responds, "About 34 years old?" The woman feeling really giddy says to the register guy. "I'm actually 49." The woman goes about her business and enters the gas station to grab some cigarettes. And asks the Pakistani clerk, "Thank you for ringing me up. How old do you think I am?" The Pakistani clerk looks her up and down. Smiling and respond's in a very heavy english accent. "Madam you must be about 29 years old." The woman smiling and laughing says to the clerk. "I'm actually 49 today." Feeling very full of herself and very happy. The woman enters the McDonald's down the street. Orders her food. Then looks at the manager. And asks the McDonald's manager. "How old do you think I am?" The McDonald's manager looks at the woman from side to side up and down. And says to the woman. "You seem to be about 31 years old." The woman really happily responds very joyfully. "Today is my birthday and I am 49 years old. Thank you." 

Feeling Good About herself

After leaving the burger joint. She stands at the bus stop. And see's a older gentleman there eating a Mcdonald's hamburger. And turns to the older man. And asks say's to him. "I hope you don't mind me asking you this. But how old do you think I am?"  The older man puts down his burger. And say's to the woman. "I am 87 years old and my vision is not what it used to be when I was young. Forgive me. But there is a sure way I can tell your exact age. And it has never failed me! See if I put my hand up your skirt I will be able to calculate your exact age." The woman feeling very full of herself and joyful. Look's around and say's "What the hell. Go ahead!" And the older gentleman starts to feel around with his hand up her skirt. A few minutes go by. And the man pulls his hand down. And looks at the woman. And say's, "Honey you're  49 years old. And today is your birthday." Completely astonished and with the look of disbelief on her face. The woman asks the Old man. "How in the world did you know that? Just from feeling me up my dress?" The man puts his half eaten McDonald's burger down. And just then the woman realizes. The old man was next to her in line while ordering!"

 

Thanks for reading everybody!

Dirty Joe!

 

 

 


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